Thursday, 11 March 2010

The little faces

Yesterday when I was checking my e-mails, I came across one of those " mass forwarded e-mails" that majority of people just delete with a click without thinking. Me, on the other hand, I don't want to feel like I'm missing out, so I have to check at least the first sentences to see what it is about before I press the delete button.
This time I was glad I did! It was about a courageous Polish woman, Irena Sendler who risked her life to save the lives of 2.500 children during the 2nd world war. When I was reading about this woman's life, I began to cry. She took risks daily, she was tortured, she was sentenced to death by the firing squad and escaped, she lived her life as if there was no tomorrow. She looked radiant at 98, and died later that year.
I have a few heroes in paperback, who challenge me, who take me to a deeper place, who encourage me to live a fuller life, surrendering mine into the hands of love.
George Muller was another of my heroes, a totally different kind, but also he saved children by giving them a home and an education, living each day by faith alone.
Irena said in her words, that the children were the ones who suffered the most, the vulnerable ones, and that's why they needed to be saved. The children.
I can't even imagine being in her shoes, it's overwhelming just thinking about it.
What an amazing life she lived, amazing things she did, an amazing love she put into practice.
If there was a little of that love in each one of us, I bet the world would look very different.
My dream was always to save the hurt, the vulnerable, to save the children, the overlooked, the mistreated, the abused ones.
When I think of them, the ones I have met face to face, it takes me back to a painful place. To a place that sometimes I want to escape from. Who likes to be in that place? Where is too much pain to bear.
I think of a little girl I met with Leukemia, almost 2 years old, who called me mama mama, every time  she saw me walk in the door of that South African hospital for terminal ill children. She loved me, I could see it in her eyes, or was it a silent plead for help? Her own mother couldn't be with her on her last days because she couldn't pay for the bus ticket and had other kids to look after (that was what the nurse told me). As I was feeding her in my lap, the nurse told me with a wink in her eyes: you know, she can feed herself perfectly fine, but she loves when you do it. My heart broke a bit inside of me that day. She was so tiny, so fragile. And that was just one face, there were many more on that day, on that week, on those months I spent there.
How many more in the world? I want to help more, I dream to make a difference. I want to go back to that place. I know it is painful, but I know it is love.
I believe we can all be part of it, either praying or giving towards the needs. Every little bit will be part of the big picture.
Every day that I spend with my son, loving, playing, cuddling, kissing, eating, comforting, singing, dancing, reading, laughing, tickling, my heart aches of love for my little one. I cry with him if he is in pain after a fall, I want so badly to make him feel better right away. Life is a hard place sometimes, and when I think of all the little ones that they don't get to have that soft touch, that tight hug, my heart aches a bit more. And that's what I would like, for a little one to be loved, to know that somebody loves them, that it can be tangible and warm whatever they will be.

I would like to thank to some friends that they are doing it right now, I admire you for it, and I want you to know that you are doing an amazing work!! Keep it up!



Tuesday, 9 March 2010

5 years

5 years together,
5 years of laughter and joy,
5 years of grace,
5 years of growing,
5 years of learning,
5 years of memories,
5 years of change and transformation,
5 years of security,
5 years of victory,
5 years closer,
5 years of love.

Happy Anniversary my love!!!!!

Five years is five years of glory and grace from our Father.

What a gift is to have you as my husband, you are more than my heart ever desire, you complete me!!



Monday, 8 March 2010

Counting blessings....

Gratitude monday,
Here goes my list for the week :

11. My son turned 20 months old!!
12. My husband and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary! :)
13. More sunshine :)
14. A beautiful, meaningful gift by my love
15. We went to one of the National Trust places to visit in England, Hughenden Manor.
16. Marc took me to the restaurant that I had always wanted to go to in his hometown, and we enjoyed every bite!
17. Lemmy was a very good boy, sitting for 2 hours while we had our 3 course meal! He loved his meal too :)
18. Marc's album is finally mixed and mastered!!
19. Worshipping in the car, and in our house with Marc's new album! :) I absolutely love it!
20. My son's strong tight hugs.
21. Having daddy at home more :)
22. Seeing my friend Wendy who is back from the Ecuador.
23. Lemmy playing with Ella (my friend's daughter) so well, and having so much fun at church.



holy experience

Saturday, 6 March 2010

Gift

5th of March.


Receiving a gift is like getting a rare gemstone; any way you look at it, you see beauty refracted. 


I really like that verse, I was just reading it the other day, and I thought how very true it is, specially for someone like me who loves gifts :) 


Today was our 5th wedding anniversary!! This morning Marc came with a little bag of small gifts with a card. His words are always beautiful and no doubt there will always be tears as they go straight to my soul.
If you ever read the book "5 languages of love", you will understand how each person has its own "love language". My highest score is gifts by far, then quality time comes a close second. Basically I have a bit of all of them, except acts of service, which scored the lowest! 
So, for me when it comes to giving gifts, it comes naturally, but for Marc it's a real effort, which it makes it the more special.


We read that one of the traditional gifts for the 5th anniversary is wood. Marc hasn't really followed this in the past, unless I requested something specific ( which sometimes he wants to know ) 
So, days ago, I orderd a "love spoon" from wales, which I thought it was sweet, with our names and date of our wedding day, among other things.


I proceeded to open the little bag, and there was a handmade crystal candle holder, just the one (the other broke, Marc told me) and a little piece of wood in the form of a cross. I have to be honest with you, I wasn't very impressed! I fiddled with the cross thinking, why is he giving me this? He must have guessed my thoughts (he knows me really well!) And said: "I made it, you know". I looked at it a bit closer and saw engraved on the bottom: LOVE CASTS OUT FEAR. I get it, I do struggle with fear and he wrote that. "That's cool, thank you", I said. "No, No, I made the whole thing" he repeated to me. The whole thing?? You mean from a branch? What? I said. Suddenly it sank in, and I started to cry. He made it for me, from scratch. A warm feeling followed and I knew this was one of the best gifts anybody had ever given me.
The thoughtfulness, the hours and days he spend making it. I couldn't believe it! 
He told me the thought came to him one day and then when he went running to the woods, he started looking for a piece of branch that would work for the task. He had never carved anything before! He started to work on it on breaks in the studio while recording, then while mastering the album, sanding it during his train rides ( looking like a freak with a long branch with no form yet) etc...
When he was telling me this, I started to remember how I kept finding a hunting knife (a gift I had given him in Argentina) out of its original place and wondering why Marc kept on moving it? Once I saw it in his jacket pocket and kept insisting: why do you have the knife with you? And he responded: In case I needed to attack a dog. Really? Note: In Luton there's lots of macho men carrying their bull terriers dogs proudly around the streets, or running wild in parks. "No, just joking", he said, still being vague and not really answering my question. Thankfully I dropped the subject. Another time I found it on his night table the night before our anniversary! (Just re reading this, I chuckle because of the sound of it!! he he) 
Now, it all made sense! He had been preparing me the perfect gift. He could bought me any of the hints I have been dropping through the weeks(which, to be honest, he doesn't really get them anyway!) But this was by far the better. He explained that is a celtic holding cross, and it fits perfectly in my hands, the wood is soft to the touch and with one of my favorite verses written on it.  Also I discovered his hidden talent! The cross came out pretty good! I felt very special. I'm indeed very loved.









Monday, 1 March 2010

Counting blessings....

Gratitude monday.
I read about this in one of my favorite blogs that I follow. Since today is monday 1st of March, I decided to start with my list too!!


  1. March 2010 started with lots of sun :)
  2. A walk in the woods, a new place discovered, fresh air and family.
  3. Lemmy's spontaneous laughs and giggles, my favorites noises in the world! 
  4. Walnut cake, what can I say? I do have a sweet tooth :(
  5. Another of Marc's songs finished
  6. Slept in after a late night while Marc watched and played with Lemmy.
  7. Lemmy waking me up this morning, with a tap in my shoulder, a huge smile, calling me mama, mama and a huge hug.
  8. Pizza for Marc & I 
  9. The world of blogs that I just got into it again, but this time with more consistency.
  10. The challenges, inspirations and encouragement I received by my friends blogs.



holy experience

A walk in the woods

And the sun is finally here, and hoping it will stay. Seems like winter lasted a very long time. Today with the sun shining through the windows, those golden rays touching everything at sight, there's hope. Hope to see another beautiful day, hope for sunnier days ahead. It warms my heart, and warms me up to be under those beautiful rays of sunshine!
Marc took advantage of such a glorious day and went running. I stayed back since Lemmy was napping. When he came back, he told me he found a new wood. We should take Lemmy, he will love it!, he said.
So, we got our wellies on and enjoyed a lovely walk into the woods.
Boys did what all boys do, throwing sticks around, running, exploring the land.
Lemmy found a huge stick and used it as his walking stick! It was so cute !!
We really enjoyed it! fresh air and sun, a good convination. Feels like spring is around the corner. I can't wait! Lighter clothes, more walks under the sun, more green and more colors in the trees and gardens.















                                                                    



































     






























Lemmy vs the vacuum cleaner

29th of February.


The vacuum cleaner. I wonder what it must look like through his eyes. This big, super noisy machine. I guess It must be pretty intimidating. I'm not sure when it began but Lemmy was really scared of the vacuum cleaner. Big time! It was hard to believe at first, his face would change and he would start crying right away. I would hold him, comfort him, feeling his two little hands griping me with an unbelievable strength. We had to stay in a different room until daddy had finished the chore.  Lemmy would not let me go. I couldn't even distracted him, he kept looking out to the direction of where the noise of the vacuum came from.
As he grew, the fear of the vacuum cleaner remained, a bit less but it was still there. By then, he would run straight to me, and I would hold him while Marc did the job. But this time we stayed in the same room and tried to explain that there was nothing to fear, it is just for cleaning,etc...
A couple of months ago he developed  a love-hate relationship with the vacuum. He started pointing telling us to put it on. He knew that when it is off there is nothing to be scared of, he would touch the buttons,etc. But when it is on, he would run away. 
Once, right after Marc finished vacuuming, he left it still plugged in. Lemmy went and switched the button on, and oh man! I had never seen him run so fast, pushing things out of his way until he made it safe into mummy's arms. Gradually, he began to stay by daddy when he was using it, but only sometimes.
But today he faced his fear. 
He pointed at the vacuum cleaner. I got ready to hold him if he needed it while Marc started the cleaning. Lemmy walked slowly towards Marc observing diligently and asked to help. Limpiar limpiar ( clean clean) 
I was in another room by this point, when I heard a scream: mama, mama...I ran to our bedroom and what did I see? My little man vacuuming the corners with the long brush attachment. He looked up to me with a little grin in his face, and my hat on! What a spectacle! Marc says he started cleaning, saw the hat, put it on and continued the job. 
Another lesson that I learned from this little man! He trusts us, and faced what he was most scared of, from his own initiative and He conquered his fear! 



There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.





















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